I love Mary: Joseph’s side of the story

Below is a monologue written from Joseph’s perspective.

I love Mary.

For the last year my plans have centered on only one thing…to marry her, to take her home…to OUR home, and raise a family together. Do you know what it is like to plan for a life and a world that doesn’t exist yet? A life so full of hope and expectation? I would fall asleep at night in the dream of that new world.

But…. Then Mary said she had something…something she needed to tell me. She was shaking as she sat across from me. Through the tears she struggled to explain something that cannot be explained, to excuse something that was inexcusable. Mary claimed there was this angel, this promise, and now…this…. baby.

I stumbled to find any words, but what could I say? My whole life I struggled to live honorably, according to the Law of Moses. I knew the expectations in our community, and I also knew the leaders who watched over it. I loved Mary, I wanted to take her home, I wanted to raise our family together. But now…what? What do I do now Lord? If she is lying how can I ever trust her? And if she is telling the truth, then, Lord, why? Why have you chosen us to walk this path? A path where I now become the Father to a boy who will look nothing like me, and yet call me his Abba?

So I decided to approach the necessary people…quietly…and put an end to the plans I had made for our life together.

And then…just a few days ago, there was this…. this dream. It was after evening prayers. Exhausted I fell in to bed. As I slept I had this dream that I was standing on a hill overlooking the Holy City. I could see the temple towering over the surrounding houses, casting shadows all the way to the city gate. I talked to no one, but I knew something was wrong. The wind was warm on my skin as I began to hear the chants and screams of the crowd as they snaked through the winding roads of the city.

Outside the gate, Roman soldiers raised a new group of criminals to be crucified. Suddenly the sun hid its face and darkness surrounded me. I heard screams of people running out of the temple as the earth shook beneath my feet. I fell to the ground in fear and with a sorrow I did not fully understand. Yet In that same moment I was enveloped in a brilliant light. I struggled to stand to my feet once again. What I experienced next is difficult to describe. It was as if all that I had known of hardship and pain and death and oppression – this old world itself seemed to melt away into the light and love of God and His new world. Instinctively I raised my hands in the air and began to laugh uncontrollably. It felt as though I had been freed from chains I could not see but had been holding me down.

As I wiped the tears from my eyes, I felt a small hand grab my own. I turned around to see Mary standing there, and instantly we were back in Nazareth. That’s when I saw the angel. Her mouth did not move, but I heard her say: “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give Him the name Jesus, because he will save His people from their sins.”

And so…. I don’t know where to go from here. I don’t know how we are going to explain this to our families. And I do not know why the Lord of all creation chose such a simple couple from a humble town to raise the son of God and usher in this new world.

I only know that a new world IS coming and it is so much more than any I had previously dreamed about.

And I know this….

I love Mary.

So I will take her home…. to OUR home…and together…. we will raise a family.

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul; 
 In you I trust, O my God. 
Do not let me be put to shame.  Guide me in your truth and teach me, 
 For you are God my Savior, 
and my hope is in you all day long.